Tag Archives: doom

Fifty Shades of WHATEVER!

. Snowqueen’s Icedragon wrote FanFiction, she wasn’t exactly trying to be Jane Austen . . . yet somehow she’s become one of TIME Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People In the World? You almost have to applaud the bitch!
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Death to the ORIGINAL Bed Intruder!: CURTAINS FOR THE NIGHT STALKER!

“Stop, killer! Halt! El matador! El matador!”

One by one, Angry Mexicans started appearing- some had steel bars, others had only their fists, but these were not feeble, bed ridden invalids! These were young, able bodied Mexicans! And they were ANGRY! Continue reading

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Until Mankind is Peaceful Enough Not to Have Violence on the News . . .

I saw the man’s face for weeks; some guy begged for his life and got his entire head blown off . . . and I’m supposed to care that Britney Spears lost a few strands of hair?
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Jobs, Housing, Personals and Crazy Mutants: CLASSIFIED!

HOWEVER I forgot that to post on Craigslist, you had to be young and beautiful! And if you weren’t, you had to say you were.

(Though if you mention CARY GRANT, they’ll know it’s a lie!)
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IF YOU DON’T GET SUCKED UP INTO SPACE . . . (part one!)

“Yes, but do you know how much can happen in a week? I could have gotten married! I could have gotten sucked up into space!”

“You could not have gotten sucked up into space,” she told me.

“Yes I could!” I cried. “I totally could just be walking down the street one day, doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo when BAM! A UFO! INCOMING! Beams me up!” Continue reading

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$LISTEN UP, LAZY BOYS!$ (though I don’t know why I bother!)

I’ve been talking to a lot of the boys lately and oh my goodness! What *babies* they have become! Sissies! Pansies! It’s bad, so bad! They’re complaining (if you can believe it) that women take their numbers and never call! … Continue reading

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MASTER DANGER AND THE JACUZZI OF DOOM: Chapter Three

Great, I thought, as I saw him peeking down Fuck Me Heels shirt. The Homeless Vampire is inviting other women on our “date.” Whatever. Continue reading

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DOOM IS THE FUTURE!: A Commercial . . .

It’s actually liberating! You no longer have to live your lives in fear of messing up because guess what? You’re ultimately DOOMED anyway. . . and nothing is worse than DOOM!
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