Tag Archives: crazy men

Death to the ORIGINAL Bed Intruder!: GOODBYE, RICHARD RAMIREZ! (part two)

This was when the Night Stalker realized all the police he’d seen were for HIM! A zig zag chase began, with patrol cars and helicopters and the whooooole kitten kaboodle!

Kind of like OJ, had OJ been on foot!
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I Had a BetaMax and a Video8! BUT I NEVER HEARD OF A “VHS PLAYER!”

The VCR died a long, humiliating death. The switch was total, if anyone hung on to a VCR at all it was because they lived in a poor immigrant community and old videos are abundant and usually free! Or because most of Generation X has no other way to watch their weddings!

No one cried, no one looked back! Continue reading

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Jobs, Housing, Personals and Crazy Mutants: CLASSIFIED!

HOWEVER I forgot that to post on Craigslist, you had to be young and beautiful! And if you weren’t, you had to say you were.

(Though if you mention CARY GRANT, they’ll know it’s a lie!)
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Womanizers Anonymous!

! Gene Simmons was quoted as saying: “I will tell a girl I want her and desire her, but I’ll tell her straight, ‘I want your sister and your mommy as well’.”

Though he’s nuts if he thinks he needs to tell ME!
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KISS ME, I’M IRISH!: A Day in the Life!

I walk across the street and a truck starts following me and beeping its horn. I look behind me and a freak is hanging out the window, leering at me. “Hey, little girl! Do you want some CANDY?” Continue reading

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IF YOU DON’T GET SUCKED UP INTO SPACE . . . (part one!)

“Yes, but do you know how much can happen in a week? I could have gotten married! I could have gotten sucked up into space!”

“You could not have gotten sucked up into space,” she told me.

“Yes I could!” I cried. “I totally could just be walking down the street one day, doo wah diddy diddy dum diddy doo when BAM! A UFO! INCOMING! Beams me up!” Continue reading

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The Rapunzel Complex?

This is worse than the Cinderella Complex . . . it’s the RAPUNZEL COMPLEX! And it’s not a joke.
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MADAM? BRING THE DELOREAN AROUND!

What kind of TIME TRAVELLER does not have a DELOREAN? Are you kidding? Is this a joke!? You think I’d ever date someone who went the Phone Booth route?
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Date One of One Hundred: NACHOS MEAN NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU’RE SORRY!

“My date’s hungry. Could you bring her some saltines or something? Maybe some cocktail olives?” He slid another drink to me.

Well. Smack my ass and call me Sally! Beyond humiliating. Continue reading

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The Year of a Hundred Dates!

November 16th. 365 days. 100 dates.

It will be done. Continue reading

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